beautiful within.

What struck me when I saw Y, was that she was very comfortable. Incredibly comfortable in herself, in her own skin, completely in tune with her illness that she didn't want anything but just to be. 
Her eyes looked little tired but her skin still had good complexion. She has put on some weight from the cocktails of prescribed medicines that made her feel battered but her face still smiled.


I knew she had lost her hair.
I knew it was her decision to just shave it all off before it starts to shed.
What was really hard for me to comprehend, was how this person could be so strong and calm. How one can be so acceptable of what can only be described as an awful disaster, I don't know.


For her though, it seems as it's just something she has got to deal with.
She is going with it, going with the flow. 
She is taking it, taking it all in as it comes. Making one step at the time and finding a room to breathe when she can.
What's very clear, is that she is not going to let this nightmare to win.
She is not going to let people to feel sorry for her nor let them make her feel down.


'' I just want to be as normal as I can be. I am still that Y with the same sense of humour.''
Then she, just like other times, smiles... beautiful within.


We all had a good laugh... just like the other day.

Almost full English breakfast


some good chorizo style sausages
rather lush sweet smoked streaky bacons
generous helpings of red ripe tomatoes in vine
deliciously woody chestnut mushrooms
beautifully crisp around the edges fried eggs
olive oil
butter
clove of garlic
thyme
salt and pepper




I am sure most of you won't need 'how to' on making this dish.
It is pretty straight forward. Roast sausages in the oven and about 10mins before it is ready chuck tomatoes in. Grill bacon rashers. Saute the mushrooms with little butter, olive oil, garlic, thyme and good seasoning. Fry the eggs in good olive oil.
And don't forget the tabasco nor the brown sauce!

I think there is a reason for her to be on the boat more often these days.
Going up and down the river, she is learning to be a tempo slower so she can appreciate what's around. Breathtaking surroundings of the river, blissful rays of warmth that the mother nature brings, soft whispers of love from V and the cheers from bright faces, friends...